Shining Brighter Than Ever

Archive for the ‘Just For Fun!!!’ Category

Job of Being A Mother :)

Job of Being a Mother When….

1. You count the sprinkles on each kid’s cupcake to make sure they’re equal.
2. You have time to shave only one leg at a time.
3. You hide in the bathroom to be alone.
4. Your kid throws up and you catch it.
5. Someone else’s kid throws up at a party. You keep eating.
6. You consider finger paints to be a controlled substance.
7. You’ve mastered the art of placing large quantities of pancakes and eggs on a plate without anything touching.
8. Your child insists that you read “Once Upon a Potty” out loud in the lobby of Grand Central Station and you do it.
9. You cling to the high moral ground on toy weapons; your child chews his toast into the shape of a gun.
10. You hope ketchup is a vegetable, since it’s the only one your child eats.
11. You can’t bear the thought of your son’s first girlfriend.
12. You hate the thought of his wife even more.
13. You find yourself cutting adult’s sandwiches into cute shapes.
14. You can’t bear to give away baby clothes-it’s so final.
15. You hear your mother’s voice coming out of your mouth when you say, “NOT in your good clothes!”
16. You stop criticizing the way your mother raised you.
17. You donate to charities in the hope that your child won’t get that disease.
18. You hire a sitter because you haven’t been out with your other adults in ages, then spend half the night checking on the kids.
19. You use your own saliva to clean your child’s face.
20. You say at least once a day, “I’m not cut out for this job”, but you know you wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Quote

Funny Love quote

“May those who love us, love us.
And for those who don’t love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if he cannot turn their hearts,
May he turn their ankles,
So we may know them by their limping.”

Irish saying

I AM THE BOSS :)

Lol!!! I would love to get one poster 🙂

Boss hangs a poster in Office
“I AM THE BOSS, DO NOT FORGET”
He returns from lunch, finds a slip on his desk.
“Ur wife called, she wants her poster back home.”

25 things guys wish girls knew

Found this on a website..I realized most of them are true and I am not going to tell my husband about point 11 🙂

1. Crying is blackmail.

2. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don’t work.

3. Don’t cut your hair. Ever.

4. Sometimes, we’re not thinking about you. Live with it.

5. Get rid of your cat.

6. Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

7. Anything you wear is fine. Really.

8. Columbus didn’t need directions, and neither do we.

9. You have too many shoes.

10. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.

11. Learn to work the toilet seat; if it’s up, put it down. We don’t complain when it is down.

12. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.

13. Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We’re bound to miss sometimes.

14. “Yes” and “no” are perfectly acceptable answers.

15. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

16. Don’t fake it. We’d rather be ineffective than deceived.

17. Sunday = sports.

18. If you don’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, don’t expect us to act like soap-opera guys.

19. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad and angry, we meant the other one.

20. Let us ogle. If we don’t look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?

21. Don’t rub the lamp if you don’t want the genie to come out.

22. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done — not both.

23. Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.

24. You have enough clothes.

25. Nothing says “I love you” like sex.

Workplace Zodiac Signs – Funny!!!

MARKETING: You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and socializing, which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are now.

TECHNOLOGY: Unable to control anything in your personal life, you are instead content to completely control everything that happens at your workplace. Often even YOU don’t understand what you are saying, but who the hell can tell?! It is written that the geeks shall inherit the Earth.

ENGINEERING: It is said that ninety percent of all personal ads are placed by engineers. You can be happy with yourself: your office is typically full of all the latest “ergodynamic” gadgets. However, we all know what is really causing your “carpal tunnel”…

ACCOUNTING: You are mostly immune from office politics. You are the most feared person in the organization; combined with your extreme organizational traits, the majority of rumors concerning you say that you are completely insane.

HUMAN RESOURCES: Ironically, given your access to confidential information, you tend to be the biggest gossip within the organization. Possibly the only other person that does less work than marketing, you are unable to return any calls today because you have to get a haircut, have lunch, and mail a letter!

DEPARTMENT MANAGEMENT: Catty, cut-throat, yet completely spineless, you are destined to remain at your current job for the rest of your life. Unable to make a single decision you tend to measure your worth by the number of meetings you can schedule for yourself. Best suited to marry other “Managers,” as everyone in your social circle is a “Manager.”